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2018-11-09 - 8:01 a.m.

As I was clicking through the channels something interesting caught my eye. MTV2 is showing a marathon of "Flavor of Love."
Things have been so crazy since the 2016 election started, we totally forgot that THIS use to be the most fucked up thing on television.
For those unfamiliar, "Flavor of Love" was a show about 20 whores competing for the affections of a fucked up looking fifty something year old drug addict, who wore a viking helmet and a massive wall clock around his neck.
You may be surprised that I referred to these bitches as whores because I never do that. You may also be surprised that I referred to these whores as bitches, but that's because if I called them women it would be offensive to the entire female population.
All of these ladies had to be orphans that no one loved, because who would let someone they cared for remotely go on this show? It was a bunch of hookers all banging the same creepy ass wino, filling a house with STD's. They had to have burned that building to the ground after they completed filming. Who would ever live in that house again?
The smells alone that festered within could choke a maggot.
These were some sleazy bitches.
No one has ever seen people this desperate in their lives. Cameras were filming all of this and it was broadcast and there they were slobbing on a crack head's fifty year old penis. There were sound recordings of it.
One season, one of these young ladies shat on the floor.
How in the fuck did this show actually happen? For three seasons mind you. Freaks and Geeks, one of the best shows on television, was canceled after twelve episodes. Flavor of Love ran for three seasons. In total they found about sixty women who wanted to get pounded by a misogynistic stain that gave them humiliating names.
Where did they even find these crazy broads?
Why would you let yourself be degraded by this disgusting piece of shit?
You have to be a real scum bag to live in a house of whores and make them fight over you to prove that you're a man.
Now, as a white kid growing up in the suburbs of New Jersey in the 80's, it goes without say that I was a huge fan of Public Enemy. I thought Flavor Flav was really cool. I wouldn't fuck him though? You would have to have the lowest opinion of yourself to do something like that.
Where are these girls now, I wonder?
God, I hope none of them are someone's mother.
Oh, fucking gross, dude.
If I found out my mother ever touched...
NO!
NO! NO! NO! NO!
Please do not tell me any one of these women has children.
I just got chills.
If there was ever a television show though, about me begging to let some retired rapper cornhole me, just fucking kill me.
I have no idea how any girl from this show could possibly still be alive. I would fucking kill myself if I were them.
How do you go on after that?
Even if they somehow managed to, MTV2 is running reruns of your greatest mistake as we speak.
I'm sure some of them will off themselves tonight.
Could you blame 'em?

 

 

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